sinner.

this past Sunday, I skipped church. and when you hear my reason, you'll judge me. but it's okay.... it was worth it. a lot has been happening in my life. for one, I found out who "Tim" is. (see car pranking story) he is exactly who I guessed he would be. and Pellula too. and then they had another lil lady helping them out as well. I had suspected her all along, but kept thinking... "no... not Gabby (not her real name :)) Gabby would NEVER do something like this and then lie to my face about it." never.

ha!

well.... she would. and did.

anyway... it's really quite cute. Pellula has an impressive conscience and felt horribly guilty for what she had done.... and once I asked her about she confessed and wouldn't stop apologizing. so I forgave her.

*warning* this could become a very long story and it would even be good. but I can't. not tonight. so I may have to cut some corners. and it may still be long to you. sorry if that bothers you. sorry enough, in fact, to warn you... like I just have. just not sorry enough to change my story-telling.

SO.

I found out who did it... and had been scheming, and plotting, and feeling like a pirate or a gang member or a agent for the FBI. I had a lovely little plan... and this is how it went down. a beautiful Sunday morning rolls around.... right after a rainy Saturday. this is important because Sunday was my first Sunday off in far too long and it was perfect pranking weather. that just seemed more like a gift, I suppose, because Saturday was so rainy and not-perfect pranking weather, but it didn't matter cause I worked. anyway. I was running fashionably late for church and came in and found a spot. not right beside Tim.... but very nearly that. and so I saw him... he saw me. just as I wanted it. then I smiled and sang worship songs while I said sorry to God for being so distracted. right before everyone was going to sit down, I slipped out. smoothly. then, I went to work. I'd already secured a jack and an acquaintance to lend a helping hand. we worked quickly. in no time at all there were 4 tires loaded in my car. what a sweet feeling that was. then, the real work began....

if you were Tim, this is how it could have and should have played out:

church is over. you hope you get to go for lunch with that pretty girl... you go outside. everyone is gathered around your car. laughing. not really AT you... but they are mostly just amazed by Danielle's brilliance. you see a note under your windshield, glowing, starkly white in the sunshine. you rush over and open it. it says, "Llama's like tires. Do you? especially the on-the-top-step kind." hmmm. clever. well, you only know one person with Llama's, and that's your best friend who lives on a farm. well, you have all afternoon and a sunny day to deal with this new adventure. so you ask a good friend to help you out, and he... (or she ;) ) complies. you take a nice drive into the country and, low and behold, there on the top step at your best friend's house is a tire! with a note! boy, Danielle sure is clever! what does it say... "Now I feel like a fire. outside. how about that place with no wood (the church). hmm... since there is no wood.... maybe we can see how rubber burns... :)" what?! she's going to burn my tire! nooooo... so you and friend now race back to the church with a sense of urgency burning at your rear. you hurry to the outdoor fire pit and HAZAA! there is tire numero dos. with a note. brilliant. what does it say? this is kind of exciting... "hmmm.. maybe you should go check out the Library I hear they have books on tires. and on how to find things that are lost. or maybe you could just ask at the lost and found to see if any tires have been turned in." that smart girl! she works at the library!! how embarrassing! now I have to go ask a Librarian for help. they'll know I've been outsmarted by a blonde girl. sigh. so you and friend now meander down to the library. good thing they're open till 5:30 on Sundays. especially cause Monday is a holiday! so they won't be open at all then! you go and humbly ask for your tire at the lost and found. they laugh, at you this time, and take you to your tire, and smile and say have a great day! you swallow and nod. time for the next note. should you be afraid...? "You could see if Levi's dad has any spare tires kickin around... I just hope he has the right kind.... " Levi's house?! that's all the way on the hill. ugh. talk about out of the way. hi Levi's dad.... oh you don't know about a tire...? oh... haha.. uh well... see... ummmm. hm. can I just take a quick peek in your backyard...? thanks! and yes. there it is. right where you can see it. and a big final note: "Dear *Tim*. well, you've now had your fun for the day. glad I could help. you're welcome. tell you friends to watch out. I'm not finished. one point for me. have a good day!" wow. she wins.

but in reality this is how it happened:

church is over. you really hope you get to go for lunch with that really pretty girl. oh, hey... its Danielle's little brother... say what?! no. she didn't. she wouldn't. oh, but she did. did she ever! that... that.... ugh (sound of disgust) well.... I have to work till 10.... sooo... I'll play that card. dang it... she didn't go for it. I'll just have to try to wait her out on this one. oh... but she wins. where did she put my tires?! I'll just be lame and steal her license plate. and my own too. mwahaha.. hello? the police you say?! well... uh... ok... I'll try to call her.... hey... so we have to be done. ya. here's $10 to try to begin to cover the car washing bills I've caused you. I know I deserve all I got and more.

ya. Tim wouldn't go get his tires or send anyone to get his tires on Sunday. and I warned hi, cause I'm not all bad. but nooo.. Monday rolls around and now he wants to know where his tires are. well... too bad brother, I say. and yes. I spoke with a police woman. she told me that she thought it was hilarious. but we had to resolve it. incase a small child was able to pull the cinder block out from underneath the car and got hurt... we wouldn't want to be held liable. so.. it's a good thing Tim had a spare.

I was mad. but Tim and I have talked and decided unspokenly to still be friends. so it's a good ending I think. 'cept he really still deserves a few more pranks.... just so we're even.

and his co-helper has yet to taste my wrath.... :)