Saturday, May 8, 2010

I'm bad at this already.


yes. it's true. I haven't blogged in a coons age. but I'm mostly okay with that.

right now, my friends are sitting in my awkward basement, watching "where the wild things are". I'm not too sure what I think of it. actually, I think I don't really like it. but I like my friends. so I am happy.

today was really an exciting day. or maybe I just live an exciting life. or maybe I let unexciting thing be exciting today. you wouldn't even believe all of the things that happened. so I'll tell you, but it's okay if you don't believe them. just know every last bit is true. look. there's even a picture of me with war paint. that's how exciting today was... and I even look tired. wow. how exciting.

oh, but I think it started (the excitement) last night. I posted this on facebook last night, but it feels like I should post it here too... it seems more... permanent that way:
well... you see... this one time.... like tonight. tonight's "one time" I was all like.... "oh! Hey Jamie! Have you seen my cool trick yet?" and she's all like... "why no! I have not!" And so I'm all like.... "hey, do you have any hand sanitizer...." (KIDS, do not, I repeat, do NOT try this at home) and she says yes. she would say yes. so I snatch up a lighter, and say... "ok. let's go to the bathroom" and so we do. and then she pours it on my hand (she would pour it onto my hand) and I ask Wade to light it. and he does light it. (he would light it). and then it's all cool and blue and on fire on my hands. so cool! only then I suddenly have too much sanitizer, and it's dripping down the back of my hand and the sanitizer is starting to burn through too fast, and I try to shake it out (the fire, that is) but that only adds to it's power, and then I try to clap it out... (that's what I usually do) and it doesn't work fast enough.... and I kind of start to freak out a little, so I wipe the fire "off my hand" (that was the idea) and ONTO my pants. so now my pants are on fire and so are my hands and it smells bad. I keep clapping at it, and win the battle against flame. this time. but not without war wounds. and Jamie's sanitizer smelled like watermelon. the end.

now we can talk about today. I started off the way I do most mornings.... by waking up. I was kind of hurrying out the door to get to work (at the library!) and I see my car. poor, poor Josephine. (do you name your cars? or any other inanimate objects? if you don't, you should) anyway.... Joey (that is what I call her for short) was covered in some sort of white powder. not cocaine. just baby powder. or flour. and it had been raining a lot the day before, so it was quite cake-like. then, it also had a great deal of ketchup. a large flower on the back window, and scribbles everywhere. I couldn't see out my windows, and so it was maybe a little bit dangerous. since I was in a hurry. I only took the time to turn on my windshield wipers. so... shoulder checking... was mostly a no go. a did roll down my windows a wee bit, but not too much cause then it was cold. and also the ketchup would go down into the inside of my door. I didn't like that idea too much. but there was one other thing. cereal letters. kind of like alphagetiis, but I don't think they were. I didn't take the time to look too closely. but these letters were arranged on the hood of my car, and this is what they said,
"DEAR DANIELLE
HOW ARE YOU
WILL YOU MARRY ME"
I wasn't even surprised when I saw that she had been pranked. I'm not too sure why. I guess it happens too often. but this time was a little bit different. I decided to keep what had happened to myself, hoping that the guilty party would incriminate themselves. but I only ended up finding out that several... well.... three... maybe four... other people got pranked. same night. it was a very late night for whomever did it. and I'm more puzzled than I've been in a long while. maybe I'll let you know if this gets resolved.

later, there was a bratty little girl in the library.... she kept lippin her mom off... and then told her mom that she was going to put her card in the book drop box, and, of course, her mom told her not to cause then she wouldn't be able to get books. *gasp* a couple minutes later, the little girl put her card-holding hand, almost in the box, and then looked up at me and dropped it. just like that. so I let her. she's not my child right...? she left the library today. without her card. now it's sitting in the lost and found. at least I didn't throw it out. right? right.

THEN.... the craziest moment at the library happened.... a teenaged young lady comes up to the desk and says, "I found this!" and I look. and in betwixt her finger is a mouse! she's holding it by the tail!! and then I see it squirming, and I see it's little whiskers wiggling s it sniffed the air. yes, it is alive! I responded quite well, exclaiming things, such as: "oh my!" "that's a mouse!" "it's alive!!" "you are crazy!!" "you're holding a live mouse!" "what's wrong with you?!" she calmly explains that she just thought she should let us know that she found it running along the top of a shelf in the children's library. ick. so I call to my supervisor and she shoo's the girl with the mouse outside. a little while later, the girl comes back in, and I ask if she washed her hands, cause she should.... and asked where exactly she found it, and my supervisor comes out, and notices that the girl brought the mouse back in.... in her hoodie pocket!!!! whaaaa....?! we finally decided that it was a mouse from a pet store, as it was very mild mannered. (and really quite cute!! you should have seen the little fella washing his face. SO cute!!) and we gave her a box for him. and he pooped in it. and we let her take it home.

tonight, youth was awesome. I was afraid that it would not be awesome, as my youth pastor just had a baby (well, his wife did. woo hoo!!), and was taking a little family time. so I was in charge. and didn't have a huge plan. but I have great helpers, and we put everyone into four teams and each team was a color, and we painted war paint on our faces to distinguish who was with who. it went so well... I think the kids had a really good time. sometimes I pray about friday nights, and God is pretty faithful to take the events that should be crappy and make them rad.

I like paint on my face. goodnight.

3 comments:

suzy said...

ack!!!! you're not bad at this. you're probably just busy.
i name my cars too: my dead one's name was vysvan. my new one's name is the blackmobile. because it's black, and my husband likes batman.
also, i looooved the mouse story, and am sorry that you were on fire.
keep being a blogger! you're stellar!

Levi said...

Hey sister! nice face paint. :P

danny.elle. said...

Hey Brother! NIce face! I mean that even. It sounds like a burn... but it's not, see? Do you see the beauty in that? A complement that is disguised as a burn. beaute.

Hey Elena! thanks for reading. :) I don't plan to catch fire again.. not for a long while.